Home for Christmas

We put up the tree and the lights and the stockings. We have the snow globes and the holiday scents and the village. I made a tree skirt out of blanket. I glittered some pinecones, and they sparkle like stars. It’s Christmas time.

But. Tyler left this weekend for a big test in California. I tried to keep busy. I went for a good run. I washed my car – can you believe it’s my first time with the self wash? It was pretty intense. I learned how to make divinity from this really cool 80-year-old couple. I went to two boutiques with my mom. I went to Target, to Old Navy, to Bed, Bath and Beyond, to Walmart. The Christmas shopping is almost done!

By four o’clock, though, I was home and alone (making Christmas cards, in fact). I turned on the lights and a Hallmark crappy Christmas movie, but I wasn’t feeling it. I missed him. For the good part of 25 years of life, I was well accustomed to being alone, to doing things on my own, to entertaining myself. I got really good at finding a lot to do. That self would have a good laugh at me now. Can’t even spend 2.5 days without Tyler and not go almost crazy.

And I realized once again, that life has changed. I’m a lot more dependent, and a world more content. And I am so excited for our first Christmas officially together. Now if Tyler could just get home, it could really begin. I’m thinking we’ll start with hot chocolate and marshmallows… 

Good Gig Somedays

I get to wear a lot of hats as a public relations girl on the job, and many of them quite frankly stress the heck out of me. But today I found one that I really, really like – the Santa hat. I’m in charge of the company’s Sub-for-Santa giving effort this year, one that has us signed up to provide Christmas for 80 children in the local community. There’s a lot that goes into such a project, but it doesn’t feel soooo intense, as some things seem to.

Today I found myself on the phone with the families, letting them know that they’d be receiving Sub-for-Santa help this year. Realizing that I have some work to do on my thoughts because they’re not always the kindest, before the process began I was thinking most of these people would just be “users of the system.” And I was wrong. I tend to be more often than not. Call after call I heard the sincere appreciation in a mother’s voice as she told me how grateful she was for the help they are receiving.

As one mother spoke, I could feel how much she absolutely loved her children – she made me want to hug my own children and tell them they’re incredible – and I don’t even have any yet. She’s one I will remember.

Today reminded me the absolute only way to feel the real depth of the Christmas spirit – really the only way to feel happy at all – is to make someone else happy. That’s what it’s all about.

Oh, the Glitter!

Now, on a high level I am opposed to the Christmas before the Thanksgiving sort of thing. BUT – I can’t help it. I am so excited this year.

I’m excited for a lot of reasons, but I’ll tell you one. This year will be our first Christmas in our first home, which means the focal point of decoration – the Christmas tree – will be brand new. What will it look like? I will (Tyler probably won’t…) remember it forever and have the decorations for years, so I feel like it has to be GOOOD.

I’ve gone to my favorite decorations store, (heard of Rod Works?) three times this week, just to get some ideas. I didn’t buy hardly anything, because you see, I’m not made of money and that store is. But I could spend hours there; it really does have the greatest things. I also went to the new place in town – Hobby Lobby – so I can try my hand at homemade decorations. For starters, I bought ceramic snowflakes and bunches of glitter.

I’ve never used glitter before. My sister says it will be everywhere in the house before I know it, so maybe I’ll revamp that opinion come holidays. But for now, you should see my snowflakes! I glittered away through Tyler’s night class and Family Night on TLC. It was so fun. I wanted to glitter other things, like cupboards and doors and counter tops, but I held on to my senses long enough to realize that mistake. What about you? How will you decorate? What ornaments might you make?

The Thanksgiving browns and rusts and deep reds will always be my favorite, so I’m glad we have a few more weeks of them. But come black Friday – the holly jolliness and all that green and red and glitter will make its debut. Can you wait until then?!

And Maybe Some Snow

Breaking News: It snowed last night - all over the place. It's a good thing it's pretty.

Ah. So I can see the mountains out my window and they’re white no longer red.

I stick my tongue at the snow.

You definitely can’t swim in the snow. No bikes in the snow. You can run in the snow, but it’s tricky and I’ve been known to fall down once or twice. Driving is lame in the snow.

You know what’s good about the snow? It’s lovely. And the boots are cute. Hot chocolate with marshmallows. Warm clothes. Crappy Christmas movies. Everything Christmas. That’s actually a better list than I thought I had in me. But no, I still don’t like the snow.

Tyler. He can snowboard in the snow and he is ultra good at that. Maybe if I go with him again this year and not just on the bunny hill, I will get totally awesome and good and maybe I’ll look forward to the snow.

But right now. Snow is unfortunate.

The Best Birthday Present Ever

Forget Disneyland. Even forget Hawaii (no, scratch that, not Hawaii – why would we ever forget Hawaii?). Tyler took me on one of the best trips ever last weekend to celebrate my birthday – the not-so-big 26 on its way tomorrow.

The first stop was the great outdoors on a surprise camping trip – I swear every tree was a different color. We shot guns, we played catch, Tyler figured out that I may never get the Frisbee thing down – I think the realization came when he was knee-deep in the river while chasing my bad toss downstream. Oops. We hiked to these cool hot springs, took to our suits and lived it up in the bathtub-like water (rumor has it some people don’t even bother with clothes at all in a place like this. We did. It was kinda slimy, after all.). Back at camp Tyler’s fire and tinfoil dinners were totally perfect. Then we slept. Next to boy scouts. Who I threatened to throw rocks at in my head.

Early and we broke camp and headed for the super sunny, always awesome St. George, Utah. The goal: the redrock backdrop and wicked vocals at Tuacahn Amphitheatre. Outdoor plays and concerts are totally my thing, and this one was maybe the best I’ve seen. It was so cool. We headed back to the sweet hotel, sweet and cheap, just the way we like it. The whole things was like an awesome dream.

The trip was quick. No low notes at all. And you know what I liked more than anything? Tyler and I spent hours just talking. We didn’t try to plan out the next 40 years or anything at all like that, we just talked. About when we were dating. About Obama and the coolest cars. About all sorts of things that probably wouldn’t matter to anyone at all. We laughed a lot and we learned some more about each other. I wish every day could be so great.

Making it Better

I left the house for work this morning and 12 hours later I headed home. That's pretty on track with how the week was. It was long. I felt like a failure at times. I’ve been working 10-hour plus days writing speeches and creating billions of PowerPoint slides for a big-deal thing on the job. The worst was Wednesday. I woke up and I knew it was going to be bad and asked Tyler if I could call in sick and he said yes, but I knew he was just being nice so I went. And it was what I thought it would be – a day when your head can’t catch a break and life lost its senses.


The failure part has nothing to do with the work part though, I was alright at that. It has to do with the being a wife and friend part.

Tyler’s school days run late on Monday and Tuesday, and this day was a Wednesday – he was finally home, and I was finally going to make him something good for dinner and spend all night just me and him.

But then it was 4:59 – Ty, I’m going to be home a little late. I’m sorry.
Then 5:23 and he offered to take a look at that recipe I’d picked out for the special meal.
Then it was 5:59 and he asked if he should put it in the oven yet.
At 6:05 – I told him I’d leave in 20.
At 6:25 – I told him I needed 15.

Finally, I left – a laptop on my shoulder and barely enough energy to feel relief.

Turns out Tyler can cook. The dinner was great – my favorite touch was the celery and peanut butter set out nicely on the table. Coming home to him was the only thing that got me through the day, or the work that followed me into the night. Thinking about the trip he’s planning for my birthday, thinking about how thoughtful he is, thinking about the little things …

I love him. He makes things better. He fixed everything. Like always.

"It's Rather Easy to be Busy"

So Saturday I was listening to this talk from one of my favorite people. And I got a text from a friend who said – “this talk reminds me of you. You are always so busy.” Tyler had already had a good laugh about how soooo for me the talk was. The topic? Basically: giving yourself too much to do and being busy all the time.

Admittedly I have a list problem. I have at least five lists going at any moment. A list of things to do at work (updated daily). A list of things to do at home each night of the week. A list of things to do at home each night next week. A list of things I want to buy someday. A list of gifts family members might like for Christmas or their next birthday. A list … o.k. a few other lists. Maybe more than a few.

And they ALWAYS have more than I could possibly do. I like to think I get more accomplished than I would have without the list – I would definitely say I’m never bored. But, as the speaker said, “there’s more to life than increasing its speed.”

Am I so all about the list that I don’t have time to be all about the things that really matter? Do I get distracted from the things that matter most? Are my priorities right? Sometimes to all of those. Needs improvement for sure.
 

I think it’s time to re-evaluate. Maybe time for a little un-organizing…

Loyal, Strong and How About Them Aggies

Ok, so they're about to lose. Again. BYU football, I'm feeling a little sick in the stomach. Don't misunderstand, I am true blue. I will pick the Cougs to win every time. But I gotta tell you, I’m a little tired of being the biggest loser in the office poll. I mean really, there’s not one of you guys who can catch the ball?

During my college days, I had the coolest job ever doing sports media relations. My main gig was track and field, but I also spent every football game up in the booth tracking players. Anyone who knew me before that point is now wondering how that ever worked out.

Well, I had a great friend in that booth who started with the basics. That’s the defense, that’s the offense. There’s the quarterback, there’s the cornerback – they’re on different sides of the ball. I learned every name of every player who played that year. I learned that it’s a deep threat (a wide receiver who is really good at catching long passes) rather than a deep throat (a person who talks low, usually a man). I once shed a few tears after I stood in the end zone and watched a one-point devastator against TCU. I love BYU football.

But there will be no tears this year, I'm not up for that much emotion play after play. We’ve deserved to lose. This is not the blue and white I know. I sure hope they find their groove sometime soon. I still hold out hope they will pull out the stops next game ... or the next. If not, I may need to take a breather from the weekend action. Just until the team and I have regained our composure.

All of a Sudden

For a few years after I got my driver’s license – I would be driving along and all of a sudden realize I could drive. It was a little disconcerting. It was like I missed a part, and there I was semi-grew up. Maybe I’m the only one this happened to…

Anyway, I eventually got used to the fact that I could drive. Progress. This weekend, though, I had another one of those “Oh my gosh, I grew up moments.” Tyler was brushing his teeth in our master bathroom, and I was lying on our bed watching him. Out of nowhere, I realized – we own a washer and dryer. That is so weird.

The thought train came down to how life has changed in the last two years. How did it happen that I can not only drive the car, but I can also own it? When did I get old enough to have a mortgage – and buy a refrigerator? Since when do I can peaches on a Friday night? And gosh, when did I become a wife - with an amazing husband?

I know there was life in between then and now, but sometimes it all seems like a blur when I sit back and actually think about it. Like a lot of those things that mattered so much are pretty insignificant, other than the fact that they are part of what made me into me.

Man, I am so glad some of things I had planned for and prayed for didn’t happen. And I am so glad some of the things I didn’t think I needed were given to me and turned out to be the most important things of all. My relationship with God has taught me that He has a plan for me, even if at times I haven’t a clue what it is. He loves us, He doesn’t give up on us and He knows everything. Thank goodness. What a wreck I could’ve made out of the whole thing without Him.

There You Have It

Since you got a tour of our house, I thought I’d follow up with a tour of our life. Now, if you’re looking for thrilling this might not be the post, but this week is as close to typical as it gets: 

Monday. Class for Tyler on Monday nights, so I went for the sweetest bike ride with my dad. We went up the Provo Canyon. The leaves are on the cusp of changing and the air had a hint of fall, but it was still warm and light enough to see. It was perfect. He’s one of my best friends for real. I followed the ride with cleaning the house. Kinda like a good run, I like it most when it’s over.

Tuesday. Visits for my church calling while Tyler worked the night away. Eleven doors knocked, one answer. But that one answer was an old lady who seemed a little lonely. I was glad about that.  

Wednesday. Wednesday and pork chops with peach and pecan sauce, served over rice with broccoli from the garden and a homemade smoothie (contributed by Tyler). Things turned out pretty well. Then the grad student studied and I read right next to him.

Thursday. Thursday and the morning was going along just fine until that unfortunate incident with my car. It was the other guy’s fault, not too much damage, but I may have to do something about my neck … My head rang. All. Day. Long. Later Tyler subbed in an indoor soccer game and he scored three goals. He is very, very good at soccer, and I love that he got to play. He loved it too. With 10 minutes to spare we got to a wedding reception for Tyler’s family friend. They dyed the white roses a bit blue and I thought it was lovely. Then Tyler iced my neck and rubbed my back and called the guy that hit me and figured it all out. I never knew having someone to take care of you could feel so great.

Friday. I canned some peaches. A lot, it seemed. It took until, well, now actually. So long. My mom gave me the steps and the kitchen and the tools, and I went for it. Lucky Tyler got out of it with a night shift. Jury’s still out on if it’s worth it. I'm a little proud though. These peaches are going to taste soooo good.

We’ll be up early tomorrow for a fundraiser race with my dad – a little 5k. It’s to help a family with finances for their mom who’s dying of cancer. A good cause and it sounds fun. And then we get to hang out all day. It’s what I’ve been waiting for since Monday.

Did you make it to the end? Me too. I’m very tired. In about two hours Tyler will come home, and we'lll talk until we fall asleep. I can’t even wait.

Come Take a Tour

I love our condo. It’s so great – such a blessing. It’s not very big, but it’s brand new and it’s ours and we’re trying to make it more ours every day. Tyler’s at work tonight, so how about a tour?

One Saturday during a rain storm we painted the kitchen. Yellow. It’s different but growing on me. We stayed up until 1 a.m. another night painting the living room “brown tepee.” Good, tired memories.

And we got gift cards for doing this study at work (sold our bodies to science), so a few weekends ago, we turned our bedroom green. (ummm ... well you can kinda tell it's green. It's greener in real life.)

We closed on our condo five days after our honeymoon (we got married six months and one week ago!). Our parents were kind enough to help us move in that Friday night - we couldn’t wait. We finished late, and you know what we did next? Set up our T.V. in the only place there was room - two feet from the couch. Then watched a movie. In our own house. Boxes everywhere, but those weren’t important. We were home.

The couch was my parent’s. The kitchen table belonged to my sister. The desk - Tyler made it in junior high.

Almost everything else was mine or Tyler’s from our single days. So far, we’ve bought a fridge, washer and dryer. Then a side table at an estate sale for $5. An armchair for $25 on KSL Classifieds. And the sweetest purchase - a porch swing for $25 from the same place. It creaks a little, but it’s perfect.

We love it here. It’s a happy place.

Grandma Movie Night

Last night was grandma movie night. The tradition started with my sister when she lived nearby – once a month we’d go to my grandma Jane’s and watch one of those sweet old-school movies that are so timeless that you can’t help but relax and laugh. Pillow Talk, Send Me No Flowers, Sense and Sensibility - you know the ones.

I held tight to the monthly tradition after my sister moved away (I really wish she could come back for grandma movie night, but it’s a bit too far) – but I’ve missed the last few months with wife stuff going on. Last night, the man had to work so it looked like a great opportunity to me.

My grandma and I have all sorts of fantastic conversations – mostly about life, a lot about love. She misses my grandpa so much. She’s such an example to me of how much you can truly love someone. And how you can serve them and everyone else your whole life – and still be frustrated that you can’t do more. I’ve cried many a tear with her calmly listening, and I’ve laughed so hard I wanted to cry. She is very blunt and very funny. Last night she told me there’s nothing better in life than sex and food. See, she knows what's up.

She says she doesn’t know what else Heavenly Father wants of her, because she just wants to get it over with and be with my grandpa again. I used to tell her she had to stick around until I found a man. Now I’ve got a good one, but I’m still hoping for a few more years with her. I know there’s more to learn.

The movie was Alfred Hitchcock’s To Catch a Thief. I’d recommend it – a classic for sure. It was such a fun night. My grandma is the coolest.

Life Far Away

I had a dream last night about Gaby, my mama in Mexico. It's been a while since I've had those dreams, but they used to happen a lot. She’s not my real mom, but she was for two months when I lived in her home during an international volunteers program. She is an amazing, strong woman. She owns a business, runs a family – and in my dream she even spoke English all of a sudden. She asked me how I was. She listened to me. She was so excited I got married. She told me all about a new business she started (which I googled, and she actually did start something new!). I woke up so content. She is my favorite memory of Mexico.

Besides dating and marrying Tyler, Mexico was the happiest time of my life. I miss it a lot, but not as much as I did when I got home. All I could think about was how sad I was to leave. I cried a lot. The learning Spanish. The love and family togetherness I felt in Gaby’s home. Even the food. And every day, members of my group went to different service projects. Me and three others were the lucky ones assigned to the Helen Keller School for the Blind. We played, we sang, we swam with the students there. It was amazing how much we learned.

I promised myself that I would never forget who I was there – and I would never forget the importance and joy of loosing yourself by helping others. I wish I could say that promise has been kept every day. Sometimes I see all too clearly how far I am from the person I want to be. But the goal’s still there! I just keep working forwards. Hopefully someday I'm that person again. 

There was something so clean about the air today – you can feel fall. Like clean sheets and crunchy leaves. For me, fall is the most wonderful time of the year (no Christmas music until after Thanksgiving or I’d be singing the song). I don’t like the cold, but if I get fall first I can handle it.

I took one of my favorite routes on my run this morning. Next to barns and the open fields with the mountains standing incomparably taller than everything else. Things come to perspective when you realize how small those cars, houses, people, and things are standing next to what matters – like the mountains.  

I was fast as lighting. No. I was like nine minutes-per-mile fast, but that’s pretty close. To me running can be a spiritual experience. For the first mile, I’m emptying my head of all the worries. The second and beyond, often it’s just me and God. I tell Him He did a really good job with the landscaping. I tell Him I’m glad He went to all the effort. Sometimes I tell Him I’m grateful for everything I have, and I’m sorry I don’t tell Him that more often. And sometimes, I tell Him about the things that are bringing me down. Usually, those things don’t seem to matter much when I’m done.

It never fails that after a run I feel so much better about life and my place in it. It’s so worth it.This morning, I was trying to count all the miracles that have happened to me in life. I named three big ones just in the past year. I’ve been really blessed. I got home feeling light and clean as the air.

Harvest!

Our bishop gave us some land at the end of our complex. He said, “plant it in the ground and the good Lord will bring it up.” He’s a wise old farmer guy. I like him. 

So, Tyler tilled. We planted. We weeded. And it grew. And grew. And grew. We had beans out our ears. And now - who knew there’s a second harvest with these things? The peas were good. The spinach and lettuce was only good for a couple weeks – don’t know if it was worth it. The broccoli was on fire. The red potatoes. Good grief, there are so many. The cucumbers are all over the place - how does one eat all of these? And the corn. Strong and tall but no quite there.

Of course some things didn’t work. Like the carrots. We thought they were weeds and we nearly picked the lot of ‘em. We are very good at weeding. And the poor, sweet watermelon. The two of them grew to the size of baseballs. Both took to rotting. They were super cute though.

There’s just something about eating stuff you worked hard to grow. It’s like pioneerish, in a good way. The pioneers were strong and resourceful. And we freeze beans and corn in our freezer.

Crash and Then

Not the freeway - the freeway
 was not pretty

I apologize in advance for writing something sad – it’ll be quick. I was stopped in traffic on the freeway yesterday, and I was thinking bummer for that guy in the accident, bummer for me when my boss is mad that I’m two hours late getting back to work. Turns out, it really was a game-over bummer for the other guy. He was 71.

I saw what happened to his car – completely smashed around the steering wheel. So fast and then life’s over. Then I read the details on the online news this morning, and I made the decision not to cry and make a scene at work. But I felt a little sick inside – you know the feeling?

All because someone else wasn’t right in their mind. Not because of a mental illness – that I can slightly understand. But because she induced herself that way somehow with substances not meant for people in moving cars.

Drugs and the like are a sad thing for me because they have the potential for so much harm. They make moms cry all over the place. However, I don’t really like how some people on the comment boards online were saying things like “she should fry” or “let’s get our guns and get rid of this waste before she gets off with a slap on the wrist.” Because this is a sad story for her too. It seems like she’s made some really bad decisions, which she has to live with the rest of her life (hopefully without car access). I wish she hadn’t done what she’s done. But she is still a person, at one point I’m sure a good one. It’s sad on every side.

I wish I could give her mom a hug.

Just Sitting (with Chips)

The “to do” things have been bringing me down lately, with triathlons taking up every weekend and exercise or some other activity weighing on any time away from work. Tyler is forever fine with whatever comes, but I get sick of doing too much all of the time. We just need a night off.

I’ll cook something - because oddly I like to cook even when I’m done with the world. I’m thinking about some sort of kabob. And some ranch-grilled red potatoes. Tyler will make a smoothie of some sort - we love those. Maybe some ice cream for dessert?

And then you know what else is on my list of to dos? RELAX. That’s it. So sad that as you grow up you have to tell yourself to do things like that. I have been looking forward to this night for three weeks.

We might play Speed. We might start reading Mockingjay - the third book in the entrancing Hunger Games series (we read nearly all of book one on our honeymoon - that’s how good it is). We might just lay on the floor and watch T.V. all night. Honestly, I’d be good with any of those. I can hardly wait.

I think I’m going to be a crazy person when I’m a mom. Judging from my nerves running amuck yesterday just with Tyler, my poor kids don’t have a chance for the calm, cool, collected type. 

Let me tell you something about Tyler. He is amazing. I’ve never seen him do poorly at anything. He’s just one of those people who can DO things. Like pretty much anything. But yesterday he did something neither of us have ever done before. A half ironman. Do you know what that is? 1.2-mile swim, 56-mile bike ride, 13.1-mile run. One right after the other. It is so hard.

Oh, and did I mention triathons are hard? And one that will take about six hours - well, there’s a real possibility of it ending badly. I spent the morning in the transition area, pacing and jumpy, waiting for him to finish each leg. He swam plenty fast, but to me it seemed like it would never end. When he was done I knew at least he wouldn’t drown. Then the bike. Crashes, flat tires, fatigue – all possible. But three hours later he came sailing in. A little wind worn, but doing alright.

Then the run. So hard after what he’d been through. I ran the last half of it with him, and I tried to think of every story I know to keep him focused on something besides his overworked body. That always helps me. But stories were not enough. He was so ready for the finish line.

He’s not too stoked about his time, but I just remind him he’s one of very few people in the world who could ever do what he just did. I couldn’t if it saved my life. I’m pretty impressed. And glad to be able to breath again.

A Year of It

Is it weird that I’m excited to be “poor”? Tyler officially started grad school last week – he’s going to make one heck of a finance guy. I’m so proud of him. Such a smart dude. But school costs A LOT of money. Tuition, books, tests and parking passes – what’s $100 when you times that by 20, again by 10 and still need more? We’re both pretty adverse to the loan scenario, which means, we’re going to be legitimately lacking in financial frivolities for the next year.

And I’m excited. I’m looking forward to clipping coupons and shopping for deals. I want to make a meal that, according to the instructions, costs $1.12 per serving (my sister, Lindsey, rocks at this). I’m excited for our dates of snowman building and hot chocolate. I’m excited to make those memories. I’ll admit, for brief moments I get nervous and I miss my single shop-a-holic days just for a second. But mostly, I just feel blessed.

Someday maybe we’ll have money and we’ll go to Europe and we’ll buy a Lexus (IS 250 in dark blue, thank you). Maybe. But if we do or if we don’t, I’m excited to look back on these days and realize how great it was – just the two of us doing our best to be good and love each other and work hard and play harder. We are “those poor newlywed college students.” The happy ones. In a way, it’s kind of like a fairytale.

Triathlons are Hard

Some people ask me why I pay to swim, bike, run/torture myself. Well, have you ever crossed the finish line? You realize that for months you trained, for months you sacrificed hours and sleep to push it just a little bit harder. And then on race day, you give it everything you have. I mean, you have to dig deep. Your mind has to say "go faster" when your body is pleading with you to stop. You conquered mountains, you conquered freezing water and a kick to the face, you conquered that big girl (in a nice way) who kept passing you. More than anything, you conquered yourself. You did it.

So, I finished. A mile swim, a 24-mile bike ride, a 6-mile run. I took third in an age group of four, but I was just four minutes back from the winner. 3 hours, 17 minutes. My goal was 3:30. The hardest part was the bike - like seven straight miles of hills and headwind.

Afterwards we got a shake and hamburgers from Dairy Keen. I would have eaten two shakes - no remorse.

Today I just can not concentrate for the life of me. I'm a little antsy. My stomach's a little tied up. I'm accomplishing little and doing much. You know what that means? Race day's ahead. Oh gosh, oh gosh, oh gosh. I'm a tiny bit nervous, I guess. It's my first Olympic triathlon. I've done sprints for three years now. And they're tough. But I knew I had to roll with the big guns once in my life. And Tyler (my husband) wasn't about to let me quit.

Oh I tried. We trained all summer, then five days before the race (he's doing a half ironman), shady dealings by the race director and it turns out our triathlon was nothing at all. So, I though, perfect. Now I don't have to go through with it. Nope, wrong. Ty convinced me - almost begged me - to finish what I started. Fine! (he's right, I know, so - FINE!). Another triathlon. A BIG triathlon. What if I don't finish? What if I come in last? At least I tried. Try-athlon. Is there some sort of award for that?

Take Two

Michael Buble said it. "It's a new dawn, it's a new day, it's a new life. And I'm feeling good." And so I am. I started this blog more than a year ago. I was at a very low point of life and needed something, anything, to think about besides ... you know. Bad days.

A loving Father in Heaven knew I needed "something" too. But instead of a blog, He sent me someone. Just a boy, but not an ordinary one. He's taught me that laughing is important, that crying is o.k. and that love is about the little things like making the bed everyday, just because he know I think it feels dirty when it's undone (so gross).

He's great, so I married him. I'm so glad I did. He's smart and patient and understanding and good and ... anyway, he's cool.

So I've been thinking lately, maybe it's time to pick up not where I left off, but where I am now. It's a good place. It's a good time.