Home for Christmas

We put up the tree and the lights and the stockings. We have the snow globes and the holiday scents and the village. I made a tree skirt out of blanket. I glittered some pinecones, and they sparkle like stars. It’s Christmas time.

But. Tyler left this weekend for a big test in California. I tried to keep busy. I went for a good run. I washed my car – can you believe it’s my first time with the self wash? It was pretty intense. I learned how to make divinity from this really cool 80-year-old couple. I went to two boutiques with my mom. I went to Target, to Old Navy, to Bed, Bath and Beyond, to Walmart. The Christmas shopping is almost done!

By four o’clock, though, I was home and alone (making Christmas cards, in fact). I turned on the lights and a Hallmark crappy Christmas movie, but I wasn’t feeling it. I missed him. For the good part of 25 years of life, I was well accustomed to being alone, to doing things on my own, to entertaining myself. I got really good at finding a lot to do. That self would have a good laugh at me now. Can’t even spend 2.5 days without Tyler and not go almost crazy.

And I realized once again, that life has changed. I’m a lot more dependent, and a world more content. And I am so excited for our first Christmas officially together. Now if Tyler could just get home, it could really begin. I’m thinking we’ll start with hot chocolate and marshmallows…